A 10 year erection will win you $400,000

The associated press reported this week that a former handyman from Rhode Island has been awarded more than $400,000 in a lawsuit over a malfunctioning penile implant.

Charles Lennon, 68, received the steel and plastic implant in 1996, about two years before new drugs like Cialis went on the market. The implant he received called the Dura-II is “a Positionable Penile Prosthesis made out of cobalt-chrome alloy strands for core strength that gives patients what they want most: ease of positioning, cosmetic concealment and adequate rigidity for pleasurable intercourse.” But there was a real problem with his implant. Lennon could not position his penis downward. He said he could no longer hug people, ride a bike, swim or wear bathing trunks because of the pain and embarrassment.

In 2004, a jury awarded Charles $750,000. Now a judge has deemed that excessive and reduced it to $400,000. On Friday, the Rhode Island Supreme Court affirmed that award in a ruling that turned on a procedural matter.

I would write a joke about all of this, but I am just not that funny. That being said, I do have a question. Did this guy keep this implant in for 5 years and then later get bored and decide to sue? If this implant really was as bad as he claims, and I do believe it would suck, why didn’t he have it removed a week or two later?

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